


Shatter me into a million pieces

by Anubisisbunagirl



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Flowey (Undertale) Being an Asshole, Gen, Papyrus (Undertale) Knows More Than He Lets On, Papyrus (Undertale) Needs a Hug, Papyrus (Undertale) Remembers Resets, Papyrus (Undertale)-centric, Sans (Undertale) Remembers Resets
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2020-09-30 10:17:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20445512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anubisisbunagirl/pseuds/Anubisisbunagirl
Summary: Papyrus was unsure of when he started hating spaghetti, 20 resets ago? 200 resets ago? It didn't really matter anymore. Not like he could do anything about it. He would just have to keep cooking it and eating it, because that's what everyone expected of him. And who was the great papyrus to let his adoring fans down?* you can call me flowey. Got bored of writting cute papyrus fics, we are getting down and dirty to torture this boy (I still love papyrus dearly and with all my heart, please don't hate me).





	1. DON'T TOUCH MY SPAGET

Papyrus stared unblinkingly as the young girl slowly approached him, arms open, ready for a hug that he knew would never come.  
He stood there for a couple more seconds as Frisk inched closer to him, knife glinting in hand.   
He stimply stared, the smile on his face waning ever so slightly. Wow, she was really drawing this out wasn't she? She usually never takes this long to kill him. Perhaps she's getting bored of it?  
Frisk paused, complete poker face, still clutching the knife. However Papyrus couldn't help but notice her hand shaking ever so slightly.   
Huh, that was new.   
She couldn't possibly be hesitating on killing him now, could she? If there was a point for hesitation, shouldnt it have been in the earlier 50 runs? Back when she was much more innocent?   
Or perhaps she was toying with him, making him think she had changed only to backstab him. Papyrus snickered ever so softly, yeah, that must be it. A demon like her could never change, despite what he may say.   
He opened his arms a little wider and cleared his throat. "HUMAN? ARE YOU NOT IN NEED OF A HUG?"   
Frisk glanced up at him nervously before quickly looking back down.   
What was she-  
*slash*  
Nyeh?  
The sudden force of the knife against his neck caught him by surprise as he toppled backwards.   
He smiled slightly as his head seemed to fall in slow motion to the dusty ground.   
Just as expected, eh?  
What else would a demon like her do?

\---  
Papyrus jerked awake in his bed, hands clawing at his neck.   
Damn. No matter how many times he got decapitated it always stung afterwards. Blasted human, maybe next time she could just kill him an easier and less painful way. He always had a stiff neck after one of those encounters.   
Papyrus brushed it off, opting to go to the bathroom and run some cool water on it. That might help, right?  
He cautiously slipped out of his bed and out the door. Softly walking through the hallway before pausing at his brothers door. A mix of green, blue and yellow light spilled out from the cracks, swirling around the small house in a tornado of colors.   
Guess Sans was having another nightmare.   
Papurus couldnt blame him. He would have too. That is, if he had dreams.   
Papyrus might have gone into the room to comfort his brother on a different run, but he couldn't bring himself to this time. He barely had enough energy as is, he certainly wouldn't be able to put on his whole 'Great Papyrus' act. So he ignored the soft whimpers of his brother as he quietly crept into the bathroom.   
Man. Papyrus was a shit brother wasn't he?  
\---

If Papyrus could, he would wipe the entire existance of   
Spaghetti off the face of the earth. He absolutely despised the food.   
Huh... wonder when that started.   
20 runs ago? 200? Doesn't matter anyways.   
Spaghetti was just a reminder of his younger days. Back when he was naive and cheerful. Spaghetti was just a reminder of the endless cooking lessons with Undyne. The lessons that singlehandedly shattered any dream of getting into the guard. Spaghetti held an empty promise to Papyrus. One of false happiness and broken dreams.   
Man... when did Papyrus get so deep? He wasn't going emo was he? That was Sans's gig.   
Heh.   
Heh?   
When did Papyrus start thinking heh?  
Wowie he really needed to stop or he would put Sans out of a job. Next thing you know, he'll be saying bad puns and napping all day.   
Papyrus chuckled to himself at the thought as he shovled globs of spaghetti onto two plates.   
There.  
Breakfast.   
"hey bro. what didya make?"  
Ahhh. Sans. Just on time.   
Papyrus spun around, "SPAGHETTI!" He declared proudly.   
"oh wow bro. what a eggcellent surprise!"  
Papyrus frowned at that, "THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE SANS."  
Sans shrugged, sitting down, "not many puns to make with noodles bro."  
Papyrus grinned, "AHA! FINALLY A FOOD THAT WILL NOT BE TARNISHED BY YOUR RIDICULOUS PUNS."  
Sans thought for a moment before grinning wider, "heh. guess you're right bro. why dont'cha just pasta me the sauce then."  
"SAAAAAANS"   
"oh. sorry bro. guess your efforts were al forno-thing"  
"THAT'S IT. I'M LEAVING SANS."  
"awww, comm'on bro, I could go on for flours"  
"BYE SANS"  
The last noise Papyrus heard was the soft chuckle of his brother as he fake slammed the door.   
Papyrus grinned to himself, pleased that he could make his brother laugh. He still felt guilty for ignoring his brother's bad dreams last night. But that was too late to fix now.   
Papyrus sighed, 3 days until the human comes. Guess he better make the most of that time. 3 days of normal before all hell breaks loose.   
He calmly strolled into the woods, no point in patrol, not like he was gonna find anyone. May as well just hang out in the woods.   
Lazy.   
He chuckled, if only old Papyrus could see him now. A lazy, depressed oaf.   
Maybe he should go find Flowey. It's always fun to hang out with his best friend.   
And who knows, maybe Flowey won't try to kill him this time.


	2. Pap, blue is definately not your color

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flowey was the only one that really understood Papyrus. Wow isn't that sad.  
Papyrus's abusive and manipulative friend knew more about him then his own brother. But Papyrus would prefer to keep it that way.
> 
> *uhhh getting into some plot here. Got tons of angst for the first few chapters, just gotta get it out of my system, i swear. Also I wrote this at like, 2 am so rip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BE PREPARED  
FOR 3 AM NONSENSE

Papyrus meandered through the forest, loosely heading towards the ruins. That's typically where Flowey liked to hang this time of day anyways. Papyrus wasn't sure why though. Something about the bed of flowers there? Something about his sibling? Papyrus honestly couldn't care less. Maybe a few resets ago he was really distraught over Flowey's backstory, but getting killed hundreds of times in a row could mess anyone up. Papyrus hated to admit it, but he had kind of turned into something of an asshole. (Oh shit, there he goes swearing again). However despite this, Papyrus always longed to go back to his childish and naive ways, liking to feed into his 'great Papyrus' persona. It made his feel... something for once.  
But sometimes that whole persona got tiring, that's when he really needed an escape. Someone to talk to, that wouldn't treat him like a 5 year old child. His best (?) friend, Flowey.  
What a piece of work that Flowey was. A traumatized kid who had to watch his sibling die only to escape the barrier only to die again, only to be brought back as as soulless flower. Sounded kinda like a terrible sit-com to Papyrus, but he wasn't one to judge. That was Sans gig.  
Papyrus chuckled to himself again, pleased with the inside joke. Nyehehe what a funny lad he is.  
"What's up chuckles?" A sudden rustle in the bushes next to him, makes Papyrus jump a little.  
"AH. HELLO FLOWEY! NOTHING MUCH, JUST A LITTLE JOKE." Papyrus waved him off.  
Flowey's grin grew wider, "Care to share, friend?"  
Papyrus acted like he was thinking about it for a bit, "MEH." He shrugged.  
Flowey's smile dropped a bit. "Hmph. Whatever." He burrowed into the ground, re-apearing next to Papyrus's foot. "What brings you here today Papyrus?"  
Papyrus dropped down to his knees, getting into a conformable sitting position . "NOTHING MUCH" he paused before sighing "Another Reset."  
Flowey drooped down a little at the change in Papyrus's voice. He was in one of those moods again. Great.  
"Ahh yes, another genocide run it seems."  
Papyrus sighed, "154th In A Row. That's A New Record."  
Flowey chuckled a bit, "You know. Your trashbag brother really put up a good fight. He lasted quite a while. Didn't think he had it in him."  
Papyrus puffed up a little at that, "OF COURSE SANS DID. HE IS THE BROTHER OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS AFTER ALL."  
Flowey and Papyrus laughed for a bit. As if that was a great joke between them. Yeah that's what it was. 'The Great Papyrus', what a joke.  
Papyrus let out one last chuckle before he sighed, looking out into the woods. They always seemed darker and darker after each reset, more foreboding. At least that's what Papyrus thought maybe he was just loosing his mind. Nyeh... wouldn't be the first time that happened.  
...  
"You know, we could just run away."  
Papyrus turned to look at Flowey in confusion.  
"I mean right now. We could just run into the woods and never come back."  
Papyrus gave a small "Nyeheh" before laying down on the grass, "Wish We Could Flowey, But I Can't Leave Undyne And Sans, You Know That."  
" You mean smiley trashbag and smelly fish lady?" Flowey jeered wrinkling his (nonexistant) nose.  
"Yes, I Do Mean My Dear Older Brother And Best Friend."  
Flowey titled his head to the side, "I wouldn't say BEST friend." He teased.  
Papyrus rolled his eyes (or tried to), resting his head on his gloved hands.  
"What About Chara?" He asked after a while, "Given Up On Them So Soon?"  
Flowey froze, facing away from Papyrus. "Uhh. We ar'nt in best terms right now." He stated in a sickly sweet voice that told Papyrus to back the hell off.  
Papyrus felt it was in his best intresting to do just so. And resumed his depressed stare into the woods.  
Run away huh?  
Sounded like a dream come true.  
Maybe next time....  
But for now, he had a child murderer to prepare for.  
\---  
"paps? you in here?"  
Papyrus froze, leg still hanging from the window. Shit. Papyrus cursed, what was Sans doing home this late in the day. Shouldn't be be napping at his station? Or maybe at Grillby's? That tab wasnt going to build itself.  
Papyes held his breath, not wanting to alert his brother to his prescense. Good thing he had decided to climb in through his window, if Sans saw that he was deviating away from the script of being on patrol, then he would know that Papyrus knows. And that is something that Papyrus hopes will never happen.  
Papyrus cautiously lifted the rest of his long legs through the window, barely making a sound.  
A brief second of silence ensued, the only sound being of Papyrus's soul thruming in his chest, before he heard Sans sigh and say, "meh", hearing his retreating footsteps. Back, back, back. Into the (not so) secret room.  
Papyrus let out a silent sigh of relief, that was close. He had to be more careful. The world may reset, but Sans would remember. The smallest slip up could cause Sans to notice something was off. And gosh darn Sans is too good of a brother to not follow up on something concerning Papyrus.  
Blasted good older brothers, they ruin everything. Papyrus chuckled to himself, he loved Sans more than anything in this world, and he knew Sans loved him too. He was the only thing that made these endless resets bearable, and Papyrus knew that Sans felt the same about him. That's why he had to act happy all the time. That's why he had to lie. This house couldn't handle two depressed assholes. Besides, it was awesome to make Sans happy. It's what made Papyrus happy. The only thing keeping him grounded.  
Papyrus slumped on his bed and groaned into his pillows, when will this nightmare end? When will he get to be truly happy again?  
How to stop this blasted time loop, that was the question.  
But it was one Papyrus wasn't sure he would be able to handle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you guys think? I got a loose structured plot here where I can either fit Gaster or not. Do we wanna see old Wing Ding boi or not? Cause I'll do it. Just say the word and that handsy basted is back in the running. 
> 
> Also I don't ship Flowey and Papyrus just so yall know o.o
> 
> Also if my style of writting doesn't sit well with you, I can change it. I have a silly kind of style and a non silly style. I save my silly style for chapters like these and my non silly style for more angsty chapters.


	3. Whooo whooo here comes the anxiety train!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Worthless...  
Useless...  
Good for nothing...  
Papyrus shook the thoughts out of his brain, there was no use obsessing over that kind of stuff. He had gotten over that a few hundred resets ago... right?  
Nyeh.  
If only it were that simple. 
> 
> * TIME FOR SOME ANGST YALL!

Papyrus sat up, shaking his head, wasn't Sans researching the time loop? Wasn't he trying to sort out this mess? Maybe he was getting closer? Maybe he would figure it out soon and get them all out of this horrible thing.  
Papyrus sighed, who was he kidding. His brother was insanely smart, but it had been more than a thousand resets. He couldn't sit around just hoping Sans would figure it out soon. He had to do something about it.

Papyrus looked out his window thoughtfully, maybe it was time he take matters into his own hands...

Take matters into his own hands?  
Papyrus laughed, take matters into his own hands?!  
How exactly was he supposed to do that? He wasn't ready to kill at a moments notice like Flowey. He wasn't super smart with that whole time stuff like Sans. He wasn't brave and strong like Undyne. What did Papyrus have going for him?  
His charming personality? His good looks? His loud confident voice? His unwavering belief that people could always be good? Please. That was just an act.  
Right?  
Yeah. That wasn't him, that was the 'Great Papyrus'.  
The great Papyrus... what a cool dude. Man, Papyrus wished he was real. He would know what to do with this demon child. He might have something valuable to offer. He wouldn't just... give up like Papyrus had.  
But he wasn't here. The great Papyrus didn't exist. He was nothing more than a mask. Pretending. The only thing Papyrus was good at.  
Papyrus chuckled darkly as he sank onto his bed. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to think of something, anything besides these depressing thoughts.  
Worthless....  
Useless...  
Good for nothing...  
What was the point?  
...  
No. He couldn't think like that. If he stressed over all that crap, he really would be useless. Sans still needed him. He had to be strong, for Sans. That was the only way.  
Papyrus tended to feel emotions rather strongly. When he was happy, he was absolutely ecstatic. When he was angry, he was red hot. And when he was sad... well it was never fun.  
The feeling that there was a storm inside of him raging throughout his whole body. The thoughts coming in waves, clashing against eachother.  
No fun indeed.  
He wanted to scream  
He couldn't  
He wanted to destroy that litthe demon child.  
He shouldn't  
He wanted to just end it all  
He wouldn't  
Papyrus could feel his breathing get quicker and more shallow  
Shit... a panic attack? Papyrus wanted to stop, he wanted to just take a calm breath. But he couldnt. It was as if he were possessed, his body reacting on its own. 

Stupid  
Naive  
Lame

Shut up...

Worthless  
Asshole  
Pretender 

SHUT UP

Papyrus was heaving at this point, desperately clawing at his body. He wanted it out. He wanted it out. He wanted it out, WHY WOULDN'T IT JUST GO AWAY.

Your brother would be better off if you just died 

"DON'T YOU DARE BRING MY BROTHER INTO THIS."

Papyrus let out a animalistic howl, grabbing the nearest object and throwing it desperately against the wall. 

*Crash*

"papyrus?!"

Papyrus froze, shocked. Sans.  
Shit  
Shit  
shit  
Shit

Papyrus shoved his gloved hand in his mouth to muffle the scream erupting from him.  
He had been so careful. He had been so good. Why? Why now? What was he going to do? What would Sans think of him when he lied to him for so long?

He lied to you first....

SHUT UP 

"pap, you in there bud?"

No. No time to freak out now. Papyrus had to get himself together. He had to. 

"SANS? WHAT ARE DOING HOME?" His voice betrayed his anxiety, Papyrus cursed himself. 

"uhh, could ask the same of you bro. are you ok?"

Papyrus took a deep breath before getting up from his bed. Pasting a smile on his face he swung the door open to reveal a very concerned Sans. 

"I AM FINE BROTHER. I WAS SIMPLY LOOKING FOR YOU."

...

"in your room?"

"Y-YES." ïf Papyrus could sweat, he would be sweating up a storm by now, "I ENTERED THROUGH MY BEDROOM WINDOW. YOU SEE, I FORGOT MY KEYS AND... I DIDN'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO GET INSIDE."

"forgot... your keys..." Sans echoed suspiciously 

"YES. THAT'S WHAT I SAID BROTHER. I NOTICED THAT YOU WERENT AT YOUR STATION, SO I FIGURED I'D FIND YOU BACK AT THE HOUSE BEING A LAZYBONES. AND HERE YOU ARE."

Papyrus paused glancing at Sans. The ever permenant grin was curved down slightly.  
Sans didn't buy it.  
Shit. 

"WELL, THEN SANS," Papyrus brushed past Sans out the door, "GUESS THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO MOTIVATE A LAZY SKELETON LIKE YOURSELF. I WILL COOK YOU SOME MID-DAY SPAGHETTI!" 

Spaghetti? Papyrus groaned inwardly. Why did he have to say the first thing that came into his mind. 

"errr. no need pap." Sans trailed behind him, still looking him over with suspicion. 

"AWW... TOO BAD BROTHER" Papyrus fake pouted.

Thank god!

Papyrus marched onwards, refusing to look back at Sans, he couldn't deal with this right now. 

"pap? are you sure you're ok?" 

"YES BROTHER!" Papyrus smiled, "BUT I DO WISH YOU WOULD STOP BEING LAZY AND JUST DO YOUR JOB!" 

Sans grabbed Papyrus's hand, pulling him back, "pap. you're not acting right."

Papyrus brushed his brother off quickly. "BROTHER. I HAVE NO TIME FOR YOUR TOM-FOOLERY. WE MUST GET BACK TO WORK. THOSE PUZZLES AR'NT GOING TO RECALIBRATE THEMSELVES." 

Sans stood still, watching Papyrus carefully. His eye lights were out, definately not a good sign. 

"COME ON SANS. NO EXCUSES."

Sans stood still for a few second before giving a smile, "snow use bro, you just gotta chill out more."

"SAAAANS! THAT WAS TERRIBLE." Papyrus groaned before adding "THIS IS SNOW LAUGHING MATTER." 

Sans chuckled a bit, "heh, nice one pap, icey what you did there."

Papyrus and Sans left the house quietly, the tension in the air was thick. Papyrus couldn't help but notice the concerned glances his brother was giving him from the side. 

This was going to be a long run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick thanks to the peeps that commented on my last work and gave me advice! It really helped. This is my first fic and I want to make it enjoyable for yall! I am trying to take your notes into consideration while writting these next chapters, and don't worry I have fun no matter how I write it! <3


	4. YOU THOT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans was always there for his brother, no matter what it was. It was just who Sans was. He cared more for his brother than anything else in the world. He would do anything just to make his brother happy. That smile... he had to remember that smile. It was the reason he HAD to break the time loop, it was the reason he HAD to kill the demon child. Sans was glad his brother couldn't remember the resets, he didn't know if he could handle the fact that Papyrus knew. Good thing Papyrus didn't know anything...Right?
> 
> *THATS RIGHT BOIS BROTHERLY LOVE!!!!!!!!!! We gonna jump into San's perspective for a little this chapter before resuming from our view as Papyrus. 
> 
> (Also i wrote this on a computer for the first time instead of mobile, hallelujah!)

Sans hated lying.   
Now granted, Sans wasn't exactly a saint in any way and definitely wasn't the best at being truthful, but if there was one thing he wished he could stop doing, it was lying. Lying to his very own brother. Lying about everything. It started off as quick little lies, about how good his spaghetti tasted or that Sans had stayed at his sentry post the whole morning and definitely didn't go to Grillby's as soon as Papyrus left. But soon as the human arrived the lying started getting out of hand. 

Papyru's friends weren't dead, they were just on vacation!   
The human wasn't bad, they just needed a friend! 

Soon lying became something of a second nature to Sans, he lied so often about everything to everyone he knew and loved, and it hurt. Especially lying to Papyrus, that was the worst. But there was no way in hell Sans would ever tell Papyrus about the resets, that was something that should never happen. Sans had to protect his brother, he just had to! It would crush pap if he knew the truth, it would tear him apart.   
Yes, Sans would do anything for his brother. He would do anything just to make Papyrus happy. 

... but would Papyrus ever truly be happy? Was his world nothing but an illusion? Wouldn't it be better if he knew? Wouldn't it be better if sans just stopped lying?   
Sans wasn't sure and thinking about it wasn't helping it in any way. He just had to trust he was doing what was best for his brother. He had to believe; he couldn't give up hope.   
So what if his research was leading him nowhere?   
So what if the human was getting more and more brutal and emotionless with each genocide run?   
So what if Sans was feeling less and less?   
He couldn’t give up. He couldn’t give up on himself... on Papyrus.   
Sans had to try three times as hard this time, he had to find a way out of this hell.   
… Papyrus.   
The one thing in his hellish existence that kept him grounded. Sweet little naïve and reliable Papyrus. He sometimes differed from run to run, but remained mostly the same each time, no matter how many monsters the human killed or how many times he was killed himself. He always looked on the bright side.   
Heh.   
His brother was pretty darn cool, wasn’t he?   
Sans set down his bottle of ketchup, standing from his stool. That did it. He couldn’t drown away his problems at Grillby’s. He had to stop sulking, if he wanted things to change, he would have to change it himself.   
‘Lazybones’, Papyrus’s voice floated around in his head.   
Sans chuckled; he WAS being a lazybones, wasn’t he? What would Papyrus think!   
So, with a small wave to Grilby, Sans shuffled out of the bar, teleporting into his house. He started down the stairs before pausing, “paps? you in there?” Papyrus wasn’t normally home this time of day, due to his patrols, but Sans could never be too careful. After a second of silence, a satisfied Sans walked out towards the back, cautiously entering his workshop.   
Ahhh, there it was. The Machine. Sans’s last hope. He wasn’t sure exactly what it did, but he was working to find out. From what he could tell it did have something to do with timelines and resets. If only he could figure out a way to get it to work, it could help him get out of the loop. It was the one thing he hadn’t tried yet at least.   
So, Sans set to work analyzing and trying to input codes to get the machine to work. He tried as many things as he could, yet the machine remained as locked as ever.   
‘Who the heck had made this thing?’ Sans sat panting in his swivel chair. 20 minutes of endless codes and hard work and he had made no progress.   
Sans was drained, he didn’t normally do this must work for this long. Of all the things he lied to his brother about, being lazy was not one of them. But he couldn’t give up just yet. He had to keep trying no matter what.   
“alright then machine, looks like we are gonna be here for a whi-”   
“DONT YOU DARE BRING MY BROTHER INTO THIS!”   
A loud howl jolted Sans from his work. What was that?! It sounded like it came from the house.   
In a flash Sans was outside of his brothers' room, just in time to hear a *CRASH*.   
“papyrus?!”   
Sans waited a second, no answer. Though he could hear the faintest pants coming from the room.   
He knocked worriedly on the door, “paps, you in there bud?”   
After a brief period of silence, Papyrus’s voice rang out from his room, “SANS? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HOME?”. San’s could hear the smallest quiver in his brother's voice.   
Not good.   
“uhh, could as the same of you bro. are you ok?” Sans asked in concern, considering whether or not he should just barge into the room. Papyrus was clearly not ok, but Sans knew he shouldn’t come out with accusations first thing, Papyrus wouldn’t handle that well.   
The door swung open to reveal Papyrus’s smiling face. Sans couldn’t help but wince slightly at the appearance of him, he looked tired, and his smile was very forced. It broke Sans’s heart to see his brother looking like this.   
“I AM FINE BROTHER I WAS SIMPLY LOOKING FOR YOU.”   
Sans’s paused, wondering if Papyrus could see the obvious lack of logic in his cover up story, “in your room?” he asked pointedly calling his bluff.   
“Y-YES.” Papyrus looked nervous.   
“I ENTERED THROUGH MY BEDROOM WINDOW. YOU SEE, I FORGOT MY KEYS AND... I DIDN’T KNOW HOW ELSE TO GET INSIDE.”   
“forgot... your keys...” Sans echoed blankly.   
“YES. THAT'S WHAT I SAID BROTHER. I NOTICED THAT YOU WERENT AT YOUR STATION, SO I FIGURED I'D FIND YOU BACK AT THE HOUSE BEING A LAZYBONES. AND HERE YOU ARE." Papyrus grinned wider, his jaw stretching unnaturally, waiting to see Sans’s reaction.   
Sans frowned at Papyrus, what was going on with him? Was it Flowey?   
Sans knew that Flowey liked to mess around with his bro in some runs. It hurt him a lot to see what that horrible flower did to his little bro, but it wasn’t within his power to do anything about it. At first yeah, he had tried to go after Flowey, but Flowey had resets. Nothing Sans did mattered; he couldn’t do anything about it. After a while he had given up trying. It tore him apart to see how hurt his brother was, but what could Sans do?   
Heh. Sans was the worst brother ever, wasn’t he?   
But Sans had thought that Flowey was done with that. After Frisk showed up, it seemed that he had slowed down a little. So this sudden change was a surprise to Sans. Was it Flowey? Or... something else?   
"WELL, THEN SANS," Papyrus brushed past Sans out the door, "GUESS THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO MOTIVATE A LAZY SKELETON LIKE YOURSELF. I WILL COOK YOU SOME MID-DAY SPAGHETTI!"   
Papyrus sounded strained, like he was trying extra hard to sound as happy as possible, "errr. no need pap." Sans trailed behind his brother, looking him over worriedly.   
"AWW... TOO BAD BROTHER" Papyrus pouted before turning around and marching down the stairs towards the door.   
"pap? are you sure you're ok?" Sans tried to catch his brothers eyes, but Papyrus seemed hell bent on not looking at Sans.   
"YES BROTHER!" Papyrus smiled reaching for the door, "BUT I DO WISH YOU WOULD STOP BEING LAZY AND JUST DO YOUR JOB!"   
No... this wasn’t right.   
Sans grabbed Papyrus's hand, pulling him back, "pap. you're not acting right." He pleaded, silently begging Papyrus to tell him what was wrong, however Papyrus quickly brushed him off.   
"BROTHER. I HAVE NO TIME FOR YOUR TOM-FOOLERY. WE MUST GET BACK TO WORK. THOSE PUZZLES AR'NT GOING TO RECALIBRATE THEMSELVES."   
Sans stood, regarding his brother carefully. What was he to do? What could he do?   
If there was one thing he knew, it was that no matter how many times he would ask Papyrus, there was no way Papyrus would tell him. Papyrus would not want to ‘burden’ his brother with his troubles, even though Sans secretly wished he would because it caused more stress if he tried to hide it.   
But... Sans was one to talk wasn’t he...   
"COME ON SANS. NO EXCUSES."   
Sans was jolted from his thoughts, regarding how he should handle the situation. He was going to find out what this was about, but for now, he had to play along.   
He walked up to his brother, giving a smile, "snow use bro, you just gotta chill out more."   
"SAAAANS! THAT WAS TERRIBLE." Papyrus groaned before adding "THIS IS SNOW LAUGHING MATTER."   
Sans could see the beginning of a small genuine smile on Papyrus, no matter the trouble, Sans knew Papyrus secretly appreciated his bad puns.   
Sans chuckled a bit, "heh, nice one pap, icey what you did there."   
Papyrus grinned a little before whirling around and heading out into the snow, Sans trailing behind silently.   
Sans couldn’t let his brother go like that. No way in hell. He made up his mind right then and there that he would find out what was troubling Papyrus.   
No matter what it took.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALRIGHTY BOIS. Update, as promised! I am excited to really start the action here. 
> 
> I had to have a duel screen to write this and a copy of the last chapter as it is that same chapter from Sans's perspective so I had to copy the wording exactly. XD


	5. its raining elsewhere




	6. EVERYTHING IS FINE! DON'T LOOK HERE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everywhere Papyrus looked, Sans was there. Everything Papyrus did, Sans watched. It was like he was being thouroughly searched for any flaws, any slip ups that indicated that Papyrus was not as fine as he insisted. But Papyrus couldn't slip up. He couldn't let Sans know the truth. And he would do whatever it took to keep it that way. 
> 
> *uhhh little bit of angst but tons of brotherly love because that's what we like here! BROTHERS BONDING.

Papyrus always hated the beginning each run. The part BEFORE the human exited the ruins, while they were still playing an innocent child to Toriel. Not because he was in a hurry to die or anything, it was more how… normal everything is. Or… how normal it used to be to him. Back when he was still young and hopeful. 

3 days.

3 days of pretending to be the happy go lucky skeleton he used to be. It was like slipping on an old suit that didn’t fit anymore. With each run it was getting harder and harder to pretend, and Papyrus could tell that Sans was starting to notice that.

Papyrus knew that he couldn’t pretend forever, Sans was bound to find out the truth sooner or later, but Papyrus had hoped that the loop would end before that. Papyrus was running out of time, he could tell. Sans was already suspicious after Papyrus’s recent breakdown, and Papyrus knew that Sans would not give up on finding out what was wrong with his brother.

Papyrus didn’t have enough time left.

2 days.

Just two days until the human will show up.

2 days of ‘normal’.

Papyrus would really have to sell it this time, wouldn’t he? Well when Papyrus tried hard enough, he could be determined. And he was determined. To make these next two days the most ‘normal’ for his brother that he could. To convince his brother to not worry about him.

And it was because of this that Papyrus woke up that morning bright and early, like he normally would. He sat in his bed for a little, staring at the ceiling, trying to excite himself.

He could do this.

He was tired.

He had to make Sans happy.

Why should Sans care?

He was the Great Papyrus!

He was a fraud.

Papyrus was shaking ever so slightly now, the voices in his head arguing louder and louder. This was not how he wanted to start his day. He had to calm down. Papyrus took a few deep breaths, focusing on the hum of his soul. Little by little, the thoughts slipped him mind until it was blank. He continued to breath softly for a little while longer before turning to look at the clock.

7:47.

Shit.

He really needed to get up.

Papyrus forced himself up from his bed, absentmindedly grabbing and putting on his usual battle armor and red scarf. He paused at the door for a little before opening it and stepping outside. He had some time before Sans would wake up, he was sure. Papyrus really didn’t want to, but he knew he had to cook spaghetti. It’s what he did every morning, and if he really wanted to convince Sans he was fine, it must be done.

So, with a sigh, Papyrus started down the stairs. No helping it now. But hey, at least he was getting pretty good at cooking spaghetti. Nyeh. Great, getting good at the thing he hated the most. He chuckled darkly before entering the kitchen. Now where was the-

“hey paps.”

Papyrus jolted, eyes growing wide at the sight of his brother already standing in the kitchen.

“S-SANS?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP SO EARLY?”

Sans gave a small shrug and a wink “hey, you said i needed to be less lazy, right bro?

So, he was gonna brush it off like that. Two could play that game.

Papyrus gave Sans the brightest, biggest smile he could muster, “THAT’S GREAT SANS!!! SO GLAD YOU FINALLY TOOK MY ADVICE! ARE YOU GONNA HELP ME MAKE SPAGHETTI TODAY?”  
Papyrus grinned, that would get him. There was no way in hell Sans would even consider cooking spaghetti, even if it was with Papyrus.

“sure bro.”

That caught Papyrus off guard.

Sans was really trying to call Papyrus out on his bluff, wasn’t he? Well no worries. Papyrus could rise up to that challenge. Sans wasn’t going to get a single thing out of him.

“GREAT, WHY DON’T WE GET STARTED THEN?”

“cool. pasta me the sauce, won’t you bro?”

“SANS! YOU ALREADY USED THAT ONE!”

“heh”

\---

Papyrus hated to admit it, but he needed a break.

Sans had been following him around non-stop for the past day. Everywhere Papyrus went, Sans followed. Papyrus had to be on high alert for 24 hours straight, acting as happy as he ever did. It had even gotten the point where Sans had slept with him in his bed the previous night. Papyrus was forced to lie awake listening to his brother pretend to sleep next to him. It had been torture, but he couldn’t let Sans see any slip ups. That was the important thing. He hadn’t had any so far, but Papyrus wasn’t sure how much longer he would be able to keep it up. He felt like he was going to crack at any second.

Just for one more day. One more day before the Human would show up.

Papyrus felt it funny that he was actually looking forward to getting murdered again. He didn’t have any clear memories of what happened when he got murdered, but he did remember a state of emptiness. Just like a dreamless sleep. A nonexistent state. It was like a breath of relief in the swirl of endless resets.

Until…

Until he had to start this torture all over again.

Papyrus sighed, frowning, as he slowed down his work on his puzzle. He hated thinking about that fact. About how everything he was doing was going to be wiped away in a matter of days. Like it never happened.

“pap? you good?”

Papyrus froze, quickly wiping the frown off his face. “ALL GOOD HERE BROTHER.”

Great. He had forgotten that Sans was there as well, watching his every move.

“you wanna take a lunch break bro? you’ve really been working yourself down to the bone this past day.”

Papyrus sent Sans an annoyed look for the pun before jumping up from his sitting position. “BUT SANS! YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN A HUMAN WILL FALL. AND I REALLY MUST HAVE ALL MY PUZZLES READY FOR THEM!”

Papyrus noticed Sans flinch at the mention of the human. He couldn’t help but smirk slightly. He probably shouldn’t have been happy about causing his brother discomfort, but his brother was the one who had been driving him crazy all day.

Sans sat in silence for a while before chuckling a little.

“wow bro. you really are the greatest.” Sans smiled up at Papyrus.

Papyrus felt his expression soften at that. Sans really was the greatest brother.

The two looked at each other silently for a while hurt in one and concern in the other. Papyrus stared at Sans until he couldn’t bear it anymore, slowly looking away.

“You Wanted To Go To Lunch?” he asked softly, “Ok. Let’s Go To Grillby’s.” Papyrus held out his hand to Sans.

“wha- bro? really?” Sans looked baffled, grabbing on to Papyrus and helping himself up.

Papyrus cleared his throat, “I MEAN, I STILL DO NOT APROVE OF THE FOOD BUT… YOU HAVE BEEN WORKING HARD ALL DAY, SO I’LL LET IT PASS… FOR YOU BROTHER.”

Sans snickered softly. “wow. … thanks bro.”

Papyrus smiled at his brother fondly, “Anything For You Sans.”

“heh. i was getting a little chili anyways.” Sans shrugged while walking.

Papyrus froze.

Sans looked back, worry written on his face, “bro?”

“Wa- Was That A Pun?”

“bro, you ok?”

Papyrus looked at Sans for a little before falling on the floor laughing. He couldn’t stop himself as he rolled across the snow, clutching his stomach and cackling.

“NYEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE”

Sans looked confused for a little before his face broke into a grin, “heh… hehe… hehehehehehehe”

Soon both the brothers were clutching one another and laughing wildly. Neither knew why, but in that moment that one pun was the funniest thing on earth.

And for a little, Papyrus could feel all his worries wash away, and things almost felt normal.

…

Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh sorry for late updates. School started up again :P SUCKS TO SUCK I GUESS. but I'm really excited that I took a break, because I have a much better understanding of where I wanna take this story :3 I'm excited to bring yall along for the ride. Also I wrote this chapter in English class, so if I fail I blame you guys.


	7. The box

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> * Papyrus kept a box under the floorboards. In the box, he had a journal. It was nothing much. Just a simple journal. But it meant the world to Papyrus. It meant the world because it held his secret. It held his truth. It held his pain. 
> 
> *this is it bois. The moment in the story I always crave when I read fanfics like this :3 it gets my heart all racey and excited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this in somewhat of a rush, ever so sorry about that so enjoy my raw unedited story.

Flowey was upset.

He hadn’t seen Papyrus in a while, ever since his trash bag brother decided to follow him like a hungry wolf. As much as Flowey refused to admit it, he highly valued his time spent with Papyrus, his best friend.

Add that to the fact of how odd Frisk had been acting this run. They hadn’t killed anyone in the ruins yet. Flowey should be glad, but he had seen that child kill countless monster for the past hundreds of runs. Seeing Frisk try a pacifist route felt… weird. Flowey couldn’t help but think that they were up to something. Yet it was something new. And Flowey craved new.

So, he decided to watch Frisk closely this time, following them like Sans followed Papyrus. Even if they did spend most of their time with mo- Toriel, whom Flowey found annoying. Listening to her screech about ‘her child’ all day was annoying, but what Flowey found interesting was the way Frisk was acting. They seemed extremely nervous around Toriel, sometimes randomly bursting into tears, and seeming more clingy than usual.

Flowey was really confused. What was Frisk doing? Were they trying to repent for every genocide run they did? That wasn’t going to fool anyone. What was Frisk really up to?

Whatever it was, Flowey was going to find out.

\--- 

Papyrus had a box.

It was a rather small box, nothing too special. Made of simple wood, with not too much in it. But it meant more to Papyrus than almost anything else he owned, besides his scarf of course.

It must have been a lot of runs ago when he had first started using the box. Papyrus wasn’t sure why, but it was the only thing he knew that remained the could keep stuff from previous runs. He had found the box a while ago, while snooping around in the secret lab behind his house, he didn’t think much of it. He put a few spaghetti ingredients in it, stored them in the pantry, and forgot about it. That was until the next run when he had discovered the box still in the pantry, with the very same ingredients.

Papyrus had been astounded, how was this possible?! It must have been one of Sans’s experiments. But Papyrus wasn’t complaining, immediately picking up the box and rushing it to his room. From then on, he had stored it in a loose floorboard under his bed, putting a few things in it little by little each run. Small stuff, just little bits and pieces of his world. Soon he had started keeping a diary in there, it was someway to vent out his feelings.

Papyrus wasn’t sure why he did that, it was something of a fear. That he would one day wake up and forget about… everything. But then again, maybe it would be nice to go back to being the clueless skeleton who didn’t know anything about resets. Maybe it would be nice to be the skeleton Sans thought he was. But at the same time, it was a terrifying idea, to forget the endless resets and pain he suffered. Papyrus would be just like all the other monsters in the underground. The ones who didn’t know about how many times they had died, over and over again.

The fear of forgetting his pain and suffering, made Papyrus shudder. So, Papyrus always kept the box. He always wrote in the journal. And he never forgot.

It had been really hard the past 2 days for Papyrus to write in said journal. Luckily Sans seemed to have lost steam with chasing Papyrus around everywhere. The human was expected to arrive the next day, and Papyrus really needed a break if he wanted to play his part convincingly. So after the lunch with Sans, he set Sans down to nap in the living room before dodging out of the house into the forest.

Papyrus was relieved when he didn’t hear any footsteps following him, it seemed as though Sans really was asleep. As he continued into the forest, he let out a long sigh, his smile melting off as he slumped down slightly. If was like a breath of fresh air. He gazed around at the thick ominous trees looming all around him. It felt like home. More than Snowdin did anyways. Papyrus wasn’t sure why, maybe it was the countless time he had been killed mere yards away from his house, or the Snowdin inhabitants that trapped him in their gaze, their expectations of him. That wasn’t home. Not anymore.

Great, just another thing the Human has stolen from him.

Papyrus didn’t know why he felt so depressed about that. He didn’t like to think about it too much. He preferred to look at the task at hand. Normally that would have been recalibrating his puzzles or yelling at Sans for taking a nap. But Papyrus couldn’t bring himself to. H couldn’t stop thinking about the endless loops. The fact that within a few days his entire world would be wiped clean, back to the beginning.

It was never good to think about that, it would just cause him to spiral into an endless state of depression and despair. But it was hard not to think about it. Papyrus didn’t know how Sans could handle all those feelings. Then again, maybe Sans didn’t. Sans also had something Papyrus didn’t have. Hope. He had his machine. He had the idea that he could save everyone, get everyone out of this hell. Papyrus had nothing. He knew nothing, he didn’t know how to stop it all. He had given up long ago.

Papyrus deeply wished he could do something. Make a difference. Maybe the Great Papyrus could, but he wasn’t him. He was useless… But that didn’t mean he couldn’t at least try, did it? After all, he did have an eternity to figure it out.

With a little bit more hope in his chest, Papyrus began to walk back to his house, getting more and more confident with each step.

Yes! He would get started straight away. He was gonna do it. He was gonna help everyone. Papyrus could feel his soul thrumming against his chest with newfound excitement. He opened the door and bound up the steps towards his room. He needed his journal. He needed to write this down.

Maybe if Papyrus had been a little less excited, he would have noticed that Sans was missing from the couch.

Flinging his door open, he dropped to the floor, scratching at the floorboard he knew kept his little box. The floor board popped off easily, hitting Papyrus in the face. He yelped and dropped the board, rubbing his face. It came off a lot easier than he had expected. He may have found that odd, but something else quickly caught his attention.

His box.

Or the lack thereof.

Where was his box? WHERE WAS IT?!

Papyrus could feel his chest rising and deflating on its own as his panic took over.

Was it gone?

Did it get lost in the reset?

Why now?!

WHY WAS IT HAPPENING NOW?!

He needed it. HE NEEDED IT.

HE COULDN’T FORGET  
HE COULDN’T FORGET  
HE COULDN’T FORGET  
HE COULD-

“papyrus?”

Papyrus froze, hand mid scratch. He turned slowly to find Sans standing above him in the doorway. His eyes full of tears, and in his hand… the box.

Sans had it. Sans had the box. Sans had opened the box. Sans had seen the journal. Sans knew.

Sans knew?

SANS KNEW!

Papyrus jumped up, his eyes wide with fear, staring at his brother looking back up at him with tears in his eyes.

“pap you-“

Before Sans could get another word out, Papyrus brushed past him, down the stairs, out the door.

“wait! pap!”

But Papyrus was already gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok guys we getting into the good stuff here :3 I'm excited for your guys to read the next few chapters. Hope yall enjoy <3


	8. Well heckin doodle!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flowey wasn't prepared for this. Not at all. He could feel a sinking feeling in his nonexistant heart. Where the hell was he? He was never late. He never missed his entrance. Sans Flowey could understand, but his brother? No. Impossible.  
But where the hell was Papyrus?!
> 
> * oh no a Flowey chapter?! But I wanted to see what happened to papyru-  
TOO BAD. YOU'RE GETTING A FLOWEY CHAPTER

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M NOT DEAD! YAY!  
can't say the same for...

Flowey squinted in the bright sun as his head pushed through the frozen ground of the Snowdin Outskirts. He practically hissed as the sunlight hit his golden petals, why was the sun so freaking bright?! Maybe he just wasn’t used to it anymore, 3 days in a dark cavern would do that to anyone. Even the lights in Toriel’s house were very dim. Flowey sighed, normally he would spend a day in the ruins, just the first part of threat- talking to the human. But Frisk was acting so dammed weird, that he had spent the whole three days stalking them. Not like he could have done much else anyways, Paps was pretty occupied with Smiley Trash bag, and nothing else interesting ever happens that he hasn’t seen before. Flowey shook the snow off his petals impatiently, now where was Frisk. Last he had seen them, they were fighting Toriel. Well not fighting, they were going to spare her, Flowey just knew. Flowey still didn’t know why they were doing a passive run and acting so nervous. It was like they had been traumatized or something. Flowey scoffed at that idea. No Frisk hadn’t been traumatized by the underground, literally everyone else had been traumatized by Frisk.

Flowey lazily pulled the leaves off a nearby bush, he best Frisk was taking their sweet time hugging Toriel and saying goodbye. Previously he had waited in the room before the ruins exit to talk with them, but he stopped doing that a few hundred runs in. What was the point? Frisk already knew what he was gonna say. And he didn’t need to keep up the appearance of being oblivious like Papyrus, Frisk knew he knew about the resets. Hard to forget after the stunt he had pulled of torturing them with endless resets during the first run. Ahhh that was fun. Maybe if he had kept that up forever no one would be stuck in this hell. Flowey missed that ending, it was his favorite. Actually, second favorite. His favorite was the true pacifist ending. He loved the feeling of being Asriel again and having a soul… well souls. Guess that wasn’t happening again.

Flowey was interrupted from his thoughts as the ruin doors creaked open revealing Frisk. Flowey narrowed his eyes at them searching for any speck of dust, nothing. Flowey sighed, whether from relief or exasperation he wasn’t quite sure. He sunk back into the ground and popped up a little ways down the trail, waiting for Frisk to make their way down the path. He followed them, watching very closely. They were definitely acting odd. They looked very nervous, glancing around with fear. Flowey frowned, watching their face closely. This was interesting. It was as if… Chara…. He cocked his head in confusion. Chara? It was like Chara was just… gone. Not saying Frisk WAS Chara but Flowey could see bits and pieces of Chara in Frisk. Their smile, their eyes, the way the hold their knife, it was like yeah there was Frisk, but there was also Chara. Not anymore. Any trace of Chara was no longer there, leaving a scared and small Frisk. What were they so nervous about? THEY were the one with the knife anyways.

Flowey pondered this as he continued forward, maybe Chara’s soul had moved on? Maybe Frisk had completely absorbed Chara? Maybe Chara had run out of determination? No, none of those seemed right. Why would that happen? Flowey suddenly paused, head snapping up.

At first he wasn’t sure why he stopped, but he noticed that Frisk too had stopped, looked confused. It was the sound. Or lack thereof. Flowey’s eyes widened when he realized the reason they had both stopped. The snapping branch. Sans’s branch. It always happened at this point. ALWAYS. Frisk and Flowey were so used to it, it felt eerie when the sound never came.

Frisk turned around to look at the branch, still intact. What was happening?! First Frisk, now Sans, Flowey was getting a sinking feeling in his nonexistent soul. Frisk started to walk faster towards the bridge, wringing their hands nervously. They paused as they approached the entranced, glancing back again. Flowey knew why, Sans always showed up by now to do his lame handshake trick. But no one came.

Frisk started to bite their nails, looking around in a panicky before sprinting through the poorly made bars and running towards the clearing with the lamp. Looking around widely they paced the clearing trying to see if Sans just fell asleep on the job. Flowey popped up in the tree line, watching Frisk with concern. What was going on? Had they done something? Maybe… Maybe Sans really was sleeping? He just missed his cue? Yeah. That’s it, Papyrus would come and wake that smiley trashba-

Flowey jolted up, Papyrus.

Papyrus. Papyrus. He should be here by now. Coming through the clearing. Coming to yell at his brother. But he wasn’t there. Flowey would feel his petals starting to quiver, Sans sure. Maybe he was just sleeping, but Papyrus. Papyrus never missed his cue. He never.

Flowey looked up to find Frisk peering around the counter of the watch station calling for Sans. He could feel his gaze harden. The human. The human had done this. They had done something to Papyrus. What were they doing?!

He wailed in rage as he ducked in and out of the ground right next to Frisk. “WHAT DID YOU DO?” he spat angrily.

Frisk whirled around, not surprised to see Flowey there, ‘I don’t know what you mean’ they signed franticly.

“You know exactly what I mean. What did you do to him?!”

‘Papyrus?’

“YES PAPYRUS YOU FUCK.”

‘I don’t know. I didn’t do anything. I’m as confused as you.’

“Bullshit.” Flowey hissed, sinking lower to the ground by never lowering his glare. “And where the hell is Chara?”

Frisk seemed to flinch slightly at that before turning away. ‘I don’t know where Papyrus and Sans are.” They signed slowly.

Flowey examined Frisk carefully, narrowing his eyes. Their expression seemed to be something of genuine confusion. But he knew they could be a good actor when they wanted, he wasn’t going to fall for that….

But what it…. What if they really didn’t know. What could have happened to Papyrus?

Had he finally given up on the human? No way.

Had he found a way out of the loop finally? Like hell.

Had Sans found out he knew about the rests and he had run away?! Impossible.

Flowey growled in frustration, he had to find out. He couldn’t… he couldn’t lose Papyrus.

Flowey looked back up at Frisk, “Listen to me here, and listen good. I don’t know what happened here, but we are going to find Papyrus no matter the cost.”

‘Sans too.’ Frisk signed back quickly.

Flowey deepened his glare at that, “yeah yeah, whatever. I don’t know what your fucking game is, but right now this is the most important thing, got it?”

Frisk pursed their lips and nodded. ‘Deal.’ They bent down and took out a boot, shoveling soil into it and offering it out to Flowey. Grumbling, Flowey uprooted himself from the ground and settled into the boot. This was going to take a while.

But no matter what he knew he had to find Papyrus. He would find out what happened. Flowey was filled with DETERMINATION.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aww heck bros. Guess you'll need to wait to see what happened to pap. Building the suspense for ya because I know you all like cliff hangers! :P  
I didn't have time to revise this so if you have any Grammer mistakes or spelling errors you can let me know, I won't get offended.  
Also whoa... Flowey swears a bit here. I maybe wrote it a little off of his character, I was just feeling angst when I wrote this. May change it later XD


	9. JUST GET INTO THE PLOT ALREADY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *squeak*  
What was that? That wasn't supposed to be the sound a floor board makes. Sans frowned down at the floor board in his brothers room, why was it making that sound? He curiously leaned down, and upon closer inspection, he noticed the edges. Scuffed. This had been previously pried open. 3 guesses as to by whom.
> 
> *GEEZ GET INTO PLOT ALREADY I know I'm sorry. I'm building up to it I swear. I just... I needed to episode man!

8 hours before

The light rocking was really calming. Sans could feel his soul thrumming soft and peacefully in Papyrus’ arm as Papyrus carried Sans through the swirling snow. Nothing but the soft crunch of Papyrus’ boots and the low whistle of the wind filled Sans’ head. It was something he hadn’t felt in a really long time… content. He felt content.

He has just had the best time with his brother at his favorite place, Grillby. It was like the endless resets had never happened, like the human had never fallen down. It was just Sans and Papyrus, like things should be.

But it’s not. Sans squirmed slightly as the thought overtook him. It wasn’t because Papyrus wasn’t acting like he was supposed to. Although he did seem calmer during lunch, that was a start. Maybe Sans could help him out. Though they only had 8 hours left before Frisk would show up, so maybe he would have to wait until the next run.

But there was something still bothering Sans about Papyrus…

He was acting a little too weird this run. Sans didn’t know what he was to do about it.

Sans groaned slightly in annoyance, how was he supposed to help his bro if he didn’t tell him what was going on.

“Brother? Are You Ok?” Papyrus’ soft voice cut through Sans’ thoughts like a knife.

“hmm… yeah bro. ate too much fries I think.” Sans lied easily stretching in Papyrus’ arm.

Papyrus sighed, “I TOLD YOU THAT GREASY FOOD IS’NT HEALTHY. NEXT TIME I’LL JUST COOK YOU EXTRA SPAGHETTI IF YOU ARE STILL HUNGRY.”

Sans gagged a little in his mouth but turned it into a convincing cough. “eh, its cool bro. you should save your spaghetti for later, don’t waste it on me.”

Papyrus huffed, “NONSENSE. YOU LOVE MY SPAGHETTI.” Sans could have sworn he saw something of a sarcastic grin on Papyrus’ face, but he couldn’t be sure.

Sans grunted slightly before slowly drifting back to sleep. Man, he was tired. Being productive these last few days had really taken a toll on him. He should just leave the productive stuff to his brother.

Sans could feel the soft plush of the couch as Papyrus carefully deposited him on it. He rolled over slightly but made no sign that he was awake. He was curious to what Papyrus might do now that he was asleep.

Papyrus stood over him for a few seconds smiling softly before his smile changed into something of a frown. He quickly turned his head away and headed towards the door. Sans could have called out, but he didn’t feel strong enough to. He was too drained.

Sans watched helplessly as Papyrus quietly opened the door and left the house. He was slightly worried about where he brother was going, but this also gave him a chance to check out what Papyrus might have been doing in his room that night.

It was obvious that Papyrus was hiding something from him, and Sans would be darned if he wasn’t going to find out.

\----

BAM

Sans cursed as he dropped a large figurine on his foot. Dang. Where the hell did Papyrus find this thing? Sans regarded the figurine, it appeared to be pure metal. Not hollow. Not Plastic.

Sans frowned at it curiously, wasn’t any he found in the dump. Normally everything in Papyrus’ room was something he had brought home. His brother wasn’t the fondest of digging through the dump without Sans, so this was definitely an odd occurrence.

Sans tore his eyes from the figurine to examine the rest of the room. He had already looked at everything, besides a few oddities here and there, it was all pretty normal. Nothing off.

Sans sighed, turning back to the door with an air of defeat. Looked like he wasn’t going to find anything in Papyrus’ room. As was expected, but it was still disappointing. Sans guessed he would just have to ask Papyrus straight up this time, but it was frustrating how evasive pa-

*squeak*

Sans paused a few feet from the door. That was odd. He glanced down at the floor board that has made a weird noise. Creaking floorboards were not unheard of, but squeaking ones? That was odd.

Sans knelt down to examine the squeaky board, it looked mainly normal upon first glance, but with closer inspection he noticed scuffs at the edges. Like someone had been handling it recently.

Sans cautiously grabbed the edge of the floorboard and pulled, it gave. Sans gawked in surprise at the box lying in the dark hole under the floor. Was that the box he thought it was?

It was the box he had made hundreds of resets ago. It was made from the tree outside their house and injected with DT in hopes it would survive the resets. He never had a chance to check it out before it had disappeared by the next reset. Sans had just assumed it didn’t work and forgot about it.

Yet here it was.

Hiding in his brother’s room.

Sans felt a sinking sensation in his chest, this wasn’t looking good at all. He carefully replaced the board and took the box to his room for closer examination. He couldn’t alert Papyrus to his finding.

Sans shut his door and sat down on his bed, caressing the box softly. He regarded it for a few more minutes before nervously opening the lid. It held a few random objects here and there, but most noticeably was a small leather-bound journal.

Sans picked the book up, examining it. It looked like it had seen better days. A diary of sorts he assumed. Normally Sans wouldn’t stick his nose in his brother’s business, but this was important. He had to know. So, he opened the journal to a random page.

Sans froze as he noticed the wording at where the date was supposed to be put. It couldn’t be.

Reset 220:

Killed again. It didn’t hurt as much this time. In fact, it didn’t feel like anything. It never does anymore. I don’t know what I was so worried about as a baby-bones. If I knew death hurt this little, I don’t think I would have been as scared. Sans still seems scared at least, but not for his death.

I notice the glances he gives me throughout the days. Especially on the day of my death. Its one of heartbreak and despair. I wish he would stop looking at me like that. I wish I could tell him it is ok. That it doesn’t hurt anymore. Sans really needs to stop worrying about me, I’m not a baby-bones anymore.

It seems Flowey has decided to run an experimental run this time. He has already begun to hurt me in little ways at least. Nothing like last time. But he seems to be targeting my emotional state more than my physical one this time. Gosh, I really hate these kinds of runs. I wish I could just…

It doesn’t matter anyways. Nothing I do will stop this. Ill just need to hold on a while longer. I need to have hope. I need-

A single splotch of dried water, the rest of the entry was crossed out.

Sans held the book with shaking hands. He shivered nervously and squeezed his eyes shut, what was this? No way. Papyrus… Papyrus knew.

The words rang through his head, clashing together and moving around wildly. Sans desperately flipped through the journal, each entry worse than the last.

Run 378:

Seems like a pacifist run this time. What a shame. I hate watching the effect it had on everyone. I hate watching Frisk pretending to be nice. I know what it is. An act. I wish it would all just reset. I wish they would just kill me.

Run 452:

I-I’m scared. The knife. I know I shouldn’t. I couldn’t. Not with Sans. But I wonder. What it feels like…

Augh. I’m too cowardly to even do this. I bet the “Great Papyrus” wouldn’t be scared. What a fraud.

The panic attacks are getting worse now. They are harder and harder to hide. I’ve resorted to scratching now, scratching at myself until flakes appear. The pain keeps me grounded. I hate to admit it, but I look forward to the pain every day.

Run 474:

I can’t believe it. I did it. 

Flowey knows. Oh god I let it slip, he knows. He gave me the most disgusted look ever. He knows. He knows and Sans doesn’t. What kind of fucked up brother am I?

Sans winced at the word, he was no stranger to bad words, but it felt wrong seeing it scribbled on the page with Papyrus’ handwriting. He felt his breathing peak as he felt he could no longer read on. It was too much. All these thoughts, these emotions.

Is this what his brother had gone through, silently each day?

The sound of the front door opening jolted Sans from his thoughts. He sniffled a little before feeling his face in surprise. He had been crying.

He inhaled sharply as Papyrus’ footsteps raced up the stairs to his room. The screech of the floorboard coming loose confirmed Sans’ fear.

Sans silently stood up and made his way to Papyrus’ room, staring in through the door. Papyrus was on the floor, clawing at himself desperately and breathing heavily. It looked horrible.

“bro?” Sans let out a soft whimper as Papyrus slowly turned to look at him, fear in his eyes.

Papyrus gawked at Sans for a few seconds before he started to breath heavily. Staring directly at the notebook Papyrus let out an anguished cry before bolting up and pushing Sans out of the way. He raced to the door and went outside without a backwards glance.

Sans collapsed to the floor crying. It was too much. His brother… his little bro.

The little skeleton that would cry when an echo flower got hurt. The little one that beamed whenever Sans praised him, proudly posing. Not this. Not the scared skinny skeleton that felt no pain anymore. Not the damaged tall skeleton that looked forward to his death each day.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

But Sans didn’t know how he was supposed to fix this one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M NOT DEAD (YET)! YAY!  
hopefully more updated within the next few months. Don't wanna keep yall waiting am I right?  
Sorry for weird chapter, getting into actual plot soon. Just... needed this chapter.


	10. To be fair it is kind of your fault

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was his fault  
It was his fault  
It was his fault  
It was his fault  
It was his fault  
It was his fault  
... it was my fault. 
> 
> *BUT WHERE IS PAP? !

Entering Snowdin town, it seemed pretty normal. A few bunnies here and there, the shops lit up, and snow falling peacefully through the air. It was rather pleasant. Or it would have been had the circumstances been different.

The monsters muttered nervously as Frisk and Flowey entered the town. Flowey was angrily whispering curses at Frisk who was trying their best to ignore him. The duo walked quickly through the town, heading straight for the skelebros house.

The door was slightly ajar, and the snow was beginning to pile up on the ground near the front door.

“Hello?” Frisk called softly, pushing the door open.

Flowey cranked his neck to try see if he could find any sign of the skeletons, but it all looked… normal.

A few things were knocked down, specifically the bone painting, as if someone had left in a hurry and hadn’t bothered to clean it up. Flowey tried to think of possible reasons why Papyrus hadn’t cleaned it up, but he couldn’t.

What the heck happened?

“… i was expecting you…” a voice growled from behind.

Frisk jolted, dropping Flowey to the floor as they whirled around. ‘Sans?’ they signed.

Sans stood before them, his eye lights were out, and he had the worst frown they had ever seen. In fact, Flowey didn’t even know his permanent grin could ever flip.

Sans flicked his hand and the door shut loudly. He summoned a few bones and pointed them at Frisk, “what the hell did you do to my bro?” He hissed.

Shaking slightly, Frisk started signing ‘I don’t know Sans. Please. We were looking for him too.’

A bone pierced through Frisk, setting her HP down slightly. She gasped in pain and clutched the place where the bone had gone through.

Sans scoffed, “lower lv, huh? looks like we are in for a nice little pacifist run. how thoughtful of you.”

Flowey struggled to get prop himself up, “Sans, enough games. What happened? Where is Papyrus?”

As Sans noticed Flowey his expression became unreadable. “you…”

Flowey knew that Sans had always hated him, and he couldn’t blame Sans for that, but Sans seemed colder, darker. Flowey recoiled a little as Sans pushed past Frisk to get to him.

“you knew. you knew all this time.” Sans was shaking slightly now.

“Knew what?!” Flowey couldn’t help but lean backwards slightly.

“knew that he knew. knew that he… knew he was suffering. you made him suffer!” Sans was absolutely ballistic now. “all those times he begged for mercy, you didn’t care, did you? even after you realized he remembered, did you stop? did you think it was more fun? Didn’t you care?” Sans fell to the ground, crying. “you did this… you did…. i did this. i did this to him. i should have known. and now… he’s gone.”

It was Flowey’s turn to be angry, “YOU did this? What do you mean he’s gone? What the hell did you do?! Oh, I get it. Did you FINALLY find out about his little ‘secret’? Congratu-fucking-lations. You must just feel awful. Poor little Sans ‘oh my life sucks, oh I’m so depressed boohoo. I carry this burden alone.’ Did you even notice Papyrus? Every day. Every day was hell for him too, but he kept to it. He didn’t let it bring him down. Yes, you fucking did this.”

Frisk nudged her way in between Flowey and Sans desperately signing for them to stop.

Sans stumbled back, tears in his eyes. He buried his face in his hands, breathing rapidly.

“Oh, cry yourself a river, build yourself a bridge, and GET OVER IT.” Flowey hissed as Frisk picked him up.

‘Stop it, both of you.’ Frisk looked years older than they were. They gave Sans and Flowey a very motherly glare, ‘Arguing isn’t going to bring him back. We need to think about Papyrus. We need to find him… I fear… I fear that if we don’t… if we don’t something bad will happen ok?’

Frisk turned to Sans with determination in their eyes, ‘Sans. What happened?’

Sans grunted, sitting up. His face was blank. He looked towards the door, “i don’t know. i found out and before i got a chance to say anything, papyrus bolted. he was messed up though, full blown panic attack by the look of it. i tried to go out and find him, but i don’t know where he went. i looked everywhere in the underground. then i thought maybe he would return home so i came back, and i found you.”

‘How long ago?’

“8 hours.”

Flowey cursed, “He could be anywhere by now! He could be out of the underground! How are we supposed to find him?!”

Frisk sighed sadly, ‘I don’t know, but we have to find him. We seriously do. I fear for his well-being.”

Sans suddenly cocked his head at Frisk confused, before it evolved into an angry scowl, “like hell you care. you are the one that killed him countless times. you are the real reason we live in this hell-hole.”

Frisk winced slightly, ‘I- I didn’t mean for all that to happen. the ghost told me to.”

Sans scoffed, “ghost? you must be shitting me!”

Flowey frowned thoughtfully, “Chara you mean?”

Frisk nodded slightly, ‘I followed their advice. They told me no one would remember!’

Flowey leaned in closer, “But she’s gone. I can’t sense her anymore. What happened?”

Frisk hugged her shoulders, ‘I don’t know. After the last run, she just disappeared.’

“That’s odd, I didn’t think-”

“ok, what the hell is going on?” Sans stood between them, hands crossed angrily. “who is this ‘chara’ fellow?”

Frisk winced slightly, ‘a ghost.’ They signed solemnly.

“My sibling” Flowey clarified.

Sans shook his head, “that explained nothing. but is this ‘chara’ a threat? are they the reason frisk did all those things?”

Frisk closed their eyes, ‘Maybe. One of the reasons. And yes, I believe they are a threat. I fear what they may be up to.’

Sans groaned, face in hands and shook his head. “this is all going to shit. i wish we had never met you, our lives would be so much easier.’ He strolled out towards the door and opened it.

“come on guys. we have a brother to save and a ghost to hunt.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates in 2 days? Enjoy it!


	11. Nothing to see here...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Papyrus missing and Chara loose tensions are growing among the trio. Will they find Papyrus in time? Or is this another filler episode? And who is causing havoc in the underground?
> 
> *oh, you want Papyrus?! I'LL GIVE YOU PAPYRUS *EVIL LAUGHTER*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Doot doot, don't mind me, just updating after what feels like an eternity!

Frisk could feel Sans stare as the trio left Snowdin, it was filled with spite and hate.

Even though Frisk had told Sans about Chara, deep in their heart they knew that there was no one to blame but themself. Sure Chara had been the one to tell Frisk about the resets, but Frisk ended up being the one to kill them over and over. At first, it had been an accident. Then it had turned to curiosity, and as much as Frisk hated to admit, it turned into some sort of pleasure. Frisk knew it wasn’t permeant, and they could just reset the world every time. It felt like all the fun, no consequence.

But eventually it started to wear on Frisk, killing became grey, then somewhat horrifying. Frisk wanted to go back to the happy ending they once had. All the monsters were a little roughed up by the surface, but they seemed a little brighter. A little happier. Everyone except Frisk.

It felt like it was all moving away from them. One of the most exciting adventures… all the monsters were spreading out, starting new lives. And Frisk was left, going to the same boring school back in some dumb foster care program. It was right back where they started. And Frisk wouldn’t accept that.

So Chara told Firsk a way to get all their friends back. And maybe the first few runs it had been fun, then it started to gray again. Killing had spiced things up for a while, but honestly Frisk had only done resets to be with their friends. And it felt like it went without saying that killing your friends wasn’t a good idea.

But it was too late, Frisk had begun feeding into Chara, and soon Chara had taken over. Giving Frisk an insatiable hunger to kill everything. Resetting, and doing it all again. It felt like an endless nightmare. But Frisk knew no one remembered… except….

Flowey. But he was soulless anyways, not like he cared. Besides he had done it many times before. But then… there was Sans. He knew what happened apparently, but it was too late to stop by the time Frisk found out. They couldn’t do anything but send sorry to Sans with their eyes every time they killed him in the Judgement hall.

But the one person Frisk never expected to remember, Papyrus. Frisk felt a small shiver pass through them. Had Papyrus seen it all? The countless times Frisk had killed him and laughed. The neutral runs he had seen all his friends die but had to pretend they were “on vacation”. The times he would look his murderer in the eye and tell them he still believed they could be better. Did he even believe that anymore?

Frisk felt like crying again. They thought they could fix everything this time. Chara had finally gone, and Frisk had regained control. They were determined to do a pacifist run this time and never reset. Give everyone a happy ending and never look back. But something had happened to Papyrus. And Frisk couldn’t help but feel a sinking feeling. Chara and Papyrus’ disappearance happened suspiciously close to each other.

“Hey, you ok?”

Frisk looked down in surprise to find Flowey staring determinedly ahead. Had he asked them if they were ok? That was the last thing they’d expect. Flowey was always so cold to them.

‘Y-yeah..’ they managed, wiping a small tear away. ‘Just worried about Papyrus.’

Flowey looked down slightly, “I think we all are…” he said quietly. This was probably as close to sadness as he could get. Frisk was honestly amazed at how much the small flower seemed to care for Papyrus despite his lack of a soul. It made sense of course, Papyrus could bring the best out of everyone. He was just so positive and supportive all the time…

Was that all an act though? How much pain had Papyrus been hiding? Frisk hugged the boot they were holding closer. They didn’t want to think about that.

“ok, listen here kid.” Sans finally spoke up, “i dont exactly trust you to have paps best interest in heart. so if you end up pulling some bullshit and killing him, im gonna make your life a living hell for the next thousand runs, you hear me?”

Frisk nodded solemnly, ‘Actually, I was hoping this might be the last run…’ they signed faintly.

Sans stared at Frisk, his eye lights out. He started to chuckle slightly, “that’s just cruel kid. dont say things you dont mean.” He brushed past Frisk towards the entrance to Temmie village.

Frisk bowed their head down as they followed him. They knew they didn’t deserve his trust, but he was rubbing salt in a wound. Caught up in their own misery, Frisk didn’t notice as Sans stopped suddenly.

“ow…” Frisk said softly, bumping into the still skeleton.

“You hear that?” Flowey perked up, staring intently at Temmie Village.

Frisk glanced up, it felt like yipping and whining?

“somethings up.” Sans said darkly, cautiously approaching the village.

Frisk started as shapes began to leave the village, Temmies were coming from left and right, they seemed to be running from something. Frisk felt a chill as they watched some tummies covered in dust, or missing body parts.

“Chara…” they whispered darkly.

Sans looked back at Frisk, terror in his eyes. “chara?” He asked. “is this chara?”

“But it makes no sense, she can’t do anything. She’s a spirit, so she needs a body to possess.” Flowey piped up.

The three exchanged a look before rushing towards the village. ‘Who did she possess this time?’ Frisk signed worriedly.

“god, i hope paps is ok.” Sans groaned, fearfully.

The three rounded the corner to the village and gazed at the carnage before them.

Temmies were everywhere, crying and howling, the ground was covered in dust everywhere. And the attacker was still at it, hacking mercilessly at the Temmies as they tried to escape. But that wasn’t the most horrifying part.

“Oh… my god.” Flowey rasped, transfixed at the horror before him.

Frisk gasped a little, putting their hand up to their mouth, tears filling their eyes.

Sans stared agape at the sight before him, his eye lights gone completely dark.

“bro…”

And there stood before the cause of the carnage. Papyrus seemed roughed up, his face held many scratches and his eyes seemed darker than the pitch-black night. He held a long-jagged bone covered in the dust of the Temmies he had killed savagely. His scarf was greyed with dust and ripped at different points. He had an expression of desperation as he prepared to strike again.

“i- i dont understand.” Sans rasped, falling to his knees.

Flowey tensed again, as did Frisk. “Chara… Chara’s here.” Flowey whispered darkly.

The three hid behind a bush, transfixed as the scene before them unfolded.

Papyrus had almost finished killing all the Temmies before him. He hacked harshly at a few before sending a bone attack to finish the few trying to escape. He stood over the dust, staring blankly at the ground. His fists clenching the bone in his hand strongly.

He jerked his head to the side, “I… I Did It.” He whispered.

He tilted his head as if hearing a response. “No, Of Course Not.” He responded to the unheard voice.

“I Know… This Is the Only Way But…” He glanced at the dust before him, some sort of horror setting into his eyes. “Oh God…” He moaned, falling to his knees. He let out a howl as orange tears fell to the ground in a huge wave, his magic rippled around him, responding to his desperation. A form seemed to materialize next to him. It was a small child, wearing a green sweater with a chopped bob.

‘Chara’ Frisk signed.

The form, Chara seemed to hold a hand on Papyrus’ back as if comforting him. “Calm down.” Chara whispered a little harshly, “They won’t even remember. It’ll be like nothing happened. But there is no other way, you need to remain strong for me.”

“But- But This Isn’t Right.” Papyrus protested, hugging his knees.

Chara leaned down to him, “You want your brother to be happy? Your friends to be happy?” her whisper rang like poison through the cavern.

Papyrus nodded slightly “But-“

“I’m giving you a chance to not be useless for once.” Chara hissed, her form becoming sharper, “I know you sulk there all day. Useless bastard trapped with no way out. Lying to everyone around you. You really are pathetic. This is the only way you can redeem yourself.”

Sans let out a small breath of anger at the words, but Frisk shook their head at him.

The words seemed to have their intended effect on Papyrus because he stopped crying. He stood up, a tired expression on his face. Holding his weapon back up, his expression morphed into something darker.

“Whatever It Takes.” He whispered, turning and walking straight past the bush the trio hid in and walking away.

The trio remained silent for a little, their eyes open wide. Chara had gotten to Papyrus. Chara had done something to him, and now he… he was going around killing monsters.

“Come on, we need to do something.” Flowey spoke sharply, urging the other two to stand up. They rounded the corner to leave the cavern but stopped as they saw something blocking their way.

“Well well, seems we have some survivors here.” Chara laughed from beside Papyrus.

Papyrus stared blankly at his brother and friends, saying nothing.

“Now,” Chara grinned, “what ever are we going to do with you lot?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) and I oop.

**Author's Note:**

> Uhhh yeah I'm gonna be doing some wack titles because I'm a wacky person o.o  
Also I wrote this on mobile and in the middle of very important work. I shouldn't be here... oh well. 
> 
> Shout out to anyone who read this... and was able to handle my trash writting XD


End file.
